confession...

for these past few wks or months i've gone thru stages that i've never imagine before. life is so haywire. with my works, family, friends, personals jumble up cause me great pain. somehow i'm barely able to manage my life accordingly.

deeply thanks to dear friends who really care. tanya am i ok or not. monitor my progress. knows when and how to say things. make me realize of certain things. buka minda saya to think in diff angles. hanya Allah yg dapat membalas jasa kalian.

with my works, i'm more settled. more focused. pick up apa yg telah saya tinggalkan. so many things i need to clear. lama betul saya tinggalkan. dah jadi NPL (guna perkataan ridz hehe). banyak sebab nape jd gini but i'm the one who caused it. kena terima the consequences (increment and bonus lorrr). minta maaf kepada sesiapa yg terasa with my action, attitude and sarcasm.

with my family, sama gak. need to patch few things. one of my friend in FB said "The key to succeeding in marriage is not finding the right person; it’s learning to love the person you found!". quite shock to me. sikit-sikit paham. thanks MCNA. i need to digest that phrase. tu yg i bule cakap now. hopefully lepas ni i bule plan apa nak buat.

with my friends, i'm sorry causing all of u so much confusion with my perangai. bukan niat saya. probably i'm doing things tanpa memikirkan perasaan kalian. i'll try to mend it back. try to be like before. hepi je. cam xde problem. but i think i can't be like before. things change. hopefully kalian can accept asri/awe yg berbeza. able to adapt. nasihatkan lah saya kalau saya dah terpesong.

with my personals, i've made up my mind. betul ke salah ke yea ke tidak ke only time will tell. i hope i bule jd cam dulu. be there for others who need me. i need to let go certain things. bukan senang. tu yg pasti especially my hepi thot. that one, i will keep forever. tu yg drive me. make me sane. make me believe in certain things. thanks to the person who give me that hepi thot. dealova (once) & takkan pernah (BIP)& that's when i love u (asyln)& hate that i love you (rihanna). songs that are really meaningful in my life. i love it very much. i'm sorry that i caused so much pain. one of my friends post this in FB "u dah keluar dari tempurung tu, but why ru still sitting on top of it? now u just need to lompat". thanks LIZA. dalam tempurung lain. luar tempurung lain. lompat dari tempurung lagi lain. kena digest and extract the intipati.

cukup lah utk kali ni.